Oops. (Mistake-making and Parenting)

So, I used to be vegetarian*.  And for a short time I was vegan.  It was a really good time in my life for developing my cooking skills –it was either learn how to cook without meat, or eat solely side dishes.  

I learned to cook all sorts of things I’d never even heard of when I was in my teens, and things I’d never imagined eating regularly: tempeh, tofu, black bean burgers, homemade spinach gnocchi.  (I even learned how to spell gnocchi.  That’s saying a lot for a kid who grew up on frozen chimichangas and pizza pops).

Fast forward and at some point, for various reasons, I started introducing fish into my diet, and eventually other meat.

 The big challenge for me though was that I’d lost all my meat cooking skills (if you asked my mom, she would have told you that I never really had meat cooking skills…or, frankly, cooking skills in general…and she wouldn’t have been wrong :) ).

 Things came to a head one night while I was on maternity leave when my spouse came home to me cooking up a storm like I was Mrs. Cleaver. I was baking salmon.

I was pretty pleased with my fish-cooking self (I was pesco-vegetarian at the time).  But when my spouse looked at his plate at the table he commented that it didn’t look like salmon.

It turns out I’d served chicken.  

Talk about eating humble (vegetarian) pie! 

I mean, how is it possible that I had taken chicken out of the freezer.  And then let it thaw.  And then cooked it.  And was passing it off, inadvertently, as salmon.

Fast forward to the present and I can make bone broth, cook tender chicken on the cue (high heat is the key!), pan fry liver (I know, I know, not everyone’s cup of tea –I’m hopeful I have not made anyone gag), and bake meatloaf.

Why am I sharing this experience? 

It’s my way of saying that you’re going to make mistakes in parenting.

You’re going to think you’re doing one thing and actually be doing the exact opposite.

You're not going to have a darned clue what you're doing.

You’re going to be so tired or out of your element that you will pull off your equivalent to cooking chicken instead of salmon.  Like snapping your baby’s onesie on and then putting the diaper on on top (another true story).

You’re going to figure something out (about sleep, about how to parent reponsively, about who your unique kiddo is and what they need), and then you will somehow unlearn it, and have to learn it again.

And again.

But you will discover things; learn things; get really great at things; and be ok with the things you’re not so great at.  

The truth is, this parenting and baby sleep thing is a journey.  With ups and downs, plot twists, and surprises, frustrations and pure amazing joy.

It’s ok to make mistakes.

It’s ok to learn stuff.

It’s ok not to know.

And I can practically guarantee it, if you’ve done it, some other parent out there (maybe me!) has done it too.

If you want to learn from my mistakes –not about cooking, but about baby sleep: I’ll stick to my area of expertise!!-- join me at the next free monthly workshop where I share evidence and experience so you can navigate sleep and parenting with fewer “oh-ohs” and more “aha"s.

Warmly,

Heather

*For those of you who who are vegan and vegetarian: I see you!  I value and honour the ethics and the merits of a plant-based diet, even though my own eating choices have changed.  It’s not always easy to navigate these choices practically, socially, and while pregnant, nursing, or parenting in large part because of the amount of time spent researching and explaining.

When I was pregnant, this was my favourite book on pregnancy and vegetarianism. My notes from this book are still useful for me.